Memoirs I Won’t Write

When I'm not working on memoir or essays, I find relief in the works of nonfiction I *don't* have to write. I've accumulated a list of subtitles for memoirs I won't be writing. I challenge you to write the subtitle for a memoir you won't write, and leave it in the blog comments or on my Facebook page. I'll wait until Monday or so and give the one that makes me laugh the loudest a signed copy of Opa Nobody (or Cover Me if you want that instead). Here's the catch: since it's nonfiction, it has to technically be true. So even though you won't be writing the memoir, the subtitle should refer to your real life. My Subtitles….. : The Chronicle of a Life in Which Julia Child Has Played No Discernible Role : A Memoir in Memoirs : A Year of Reading Anti-Memoirs and Coming to the Conclusion That They're Basically Self-Hating Memoirs : My Life with the Thrill Kill Kult–Oh, Wait, That Wasn't Me : No She Didn't : How to Try in Various Fields without Really Succeeding : A Memoir of Moderation : One Midwestern Nerdy Bitch's Crazy Story : Three Not-So-Nice Verbs and How I Do Them : Good Thing I've Got it all Figured Out Now : A Graphic Novel In Which People Just Sit on Couches Holding Books Because That's Basically What I Do : Dr. Spock to Dr. Sears In Two Generations with Colic : Things That will Freak You Out : Things That Have Totally Freaked Me Out Every Day of My Entire Life : By Which I Mean: Awesome! : Libraries I've Torn Through Like the She-Beast I Am : A Year of Whining : My Bond with Used Nissan Vehicles that Couldn't Be Killed : I'll Forward You the Link : A Meditation on Superballs: I Mean Real Superballs, the Kind in the Vending Machines; Don't Be Crude : I Saw it On Facebook Somewhere : Pedagogy as Gleaned from Facebook Links : Craft Supplies I Have Neglected and Under-utilized But Cannot Part With Because That Would Mean Confronting My Failure to Craft


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